Sunday, March 22, 2009

What are ears for?

What are ears for? Listening? Certainly not. That theory has been disproved time and time again by my defiant little 4 year old.

If they're not for listening, they must be good for something, right? Hm... how about putting a very small foreign object in one of them and then not telling anybody so that, like, a month or so later it is being cleaned out with a cutip which causes you to wince and exclaim "Ow! That hurts!!" and your mom and dad get a flashlight and look inside your orifice to see what could be causing you this pain and your mother says something like "Oh my gosh- there is something bright red or hot pink in there!" and then your father says "Duh- come on, that's her EAR DRUM" [yeah, since ear drums are visible with just a flash light and they are HOT PINK]... and upon further inspection the father says "Huh... I guess it's not her ear drum... what IS that...?"

Mom asks if you remember putting anything in your ear and of course your answer is "No."

Dad then proceeds to try to get it out with tweezers, but to no avail since they're too big, so then it's time to take you to instacare where the doctor uses her tiny little tweezers to pull this unknown bright red thing out of your ear while you scream because your ear hairs are being ripped out along with the tiny foreign object.

The then doctor places the tiny, bright red, foam heart sticker on the table. At which point you might say something like "Oh yeah... I remember putting that in my ear."

22 comments:

Schwartz Family said...

Hey at least she didn't shoce something up her nose! My sister did that when we were little.

I hope my daughter doesn't get curious like that! All you can do is laugh and post it on your blog for her prom date to see one day!

Schwartz Family said...

I meant Shove of course.

Heather said...

That's too funny!

Annie said...

this made me laugh pretty hard!! especially the end comment. "oh yeah, i do remember that" too funny

Sara said...

That is too funny! I'm glad it didn't do any permanent damage. My sister got rocks put in her ear as a young child and ended up having to get tubes in her ears. I think it was related, but I was young, so maybe they were two separate incidents. ;-)

wurstens5 said...

That is to funny.

Brandon said...

Oh, Kennedy... Ouch! I once poked a q-tip too far in my ear when cleaning, and got a bit scared when I saw blood coming out of my ear! The doctor had me wash it with eye drops (yes, eye drops) for a few days and I was fine, but it hurt a bit. Glad there wasn't any serious damage for Kennedy.
By the way, Ash - I love the way you wrote this post - you're so creative!

Erin and Daryl said...

Ashley that is one funny story. I had to tell Daryl and he thought it was funny. Man I can't wait for those days. Right now I'm chasen Zen around the house making sure he's not chucking his toys at Taylor. Its a scary thing ya know:) Oh I hope you don't mind, but I found you on here so now your my friend whether you like it or not!

Kaija said...

Ashley that is hilarious! I read it twice it was that good! Glad the foreign object, well its not foreign anymore its a sticker! But glad its out!

the mom said...

This is almost as good - but not quite - as when I had to take you to have a tiny jingle bell surgically removed from your body......... I'll let you decide if you want to share that story with your readers :)

Kaeloni said...

HAHAH! Oh my! That is too funny. I'm scared for my baby to grow up!

Shopgirl1483 said...

OMG! I was so nervous while I was reading that story. You are a good story teller. but i'm glad there was no damage. oh kennedy...

Sharee and Court said...

oh the joy of having children... Brady is getting into putting small objects in his mouth... like coins, rings, and other little things... I am just waiting for the time that I don't see him do it an dhe starts choking or something... I hope it never happens, of course.

The Martinez Family said...

Hahaha! I love it! I had a kid in my preschool class do that with a piece of corn. I guess it's better then sticking it up the nose though...

Kristin said...

Okay, you get to add this one to your "Leverage" List... For that time sure to come in the distant future when you need some bargaining power with your teenage daughter, you can add the time and expense involved in this little drama to the list. "So, Kennedy... Remember that time you put the red foam heart in your ear and we had to pay the nice doctor to extract it? Well, we get credit for that one.."

Ashley Rae said...

LOL... yes, I'll definitely be able to use this against her when she starts dating. Although I'm hoping that's not for another 15 years.

melanie33 said...

i myself find my ears a great space for storage as well. as well as other places....

Lindsey said...

way to go Kennedy!

Jennifer said...

This reminds me of the time my little brother Ryan,age 3, got a tiny tart stuck up his nose (self-inflicted). We were all standing in line at a Disneyworld ride when it happened. Funny memory. :)

Smiley Family said...

Oh, that is funny! The story is great, but the way you told it makes it even better!

So, where did you put a jingle bell?

Angelique Archuleta said...

Oh my gosh, that is so funny. Children....

Ashley Rae said...

Jamie- When I was about 4, I liked the sound of jingle bells- and I decided to put one in my panties, since it would jingle when I walked. Let's just say I guess I forgot it was down there, since it stopped jingling... so... yeah. That jingle bell inched it's way up until it was lodged somewhere extremely unpleasant. LOL